The Couch - ALANIS MORISSETTE

The Couch - ALANIS MORISSETTE

you hadn't seen your father in such a long time
he died in the arms of his lover how dare he
your mother never left the house
she never married anyone else you took it upon yourself to console her

you reminded her so much of your father
so you were banished and you wonder why you're so hypersensitive
and why you can't trust anyone but us
but then how can I begin to forgive her so many years under bridges with dirty water
she was foolish and selfish and cowardly if you ask me

I don't know where to begin in all of my 50 odd years
I have been silently suffering and adapting perpetuating and enduring
who are you younger generation to tell me that I have unresolved problems
not many examples of fruits of this type of excruciating labour

how can you just throw words around like grieve and heal and mourn
I feel fine we may not have been born as awake as you were
it was much harder in those days we had paper routes uphill both ways
we went from school to a job to a wife to instant parenthood

I walked into his office I felt so self-conscious on the couch
he was sitting down across from me he was writing down his hypothesis I don't know
i've got a loving supportive wife who doesn't know how involved she should get
you say his interjecting was him just calling me on my shit?

just the other day my sweet daughter I was driving past 203 I walked up the stairs in my mind's eye
I remember how they would creak loudly
she was only responsive with a drink he was only responsive by photo
I was only trying to be the best big brother I could

i've walked sometimes confused sometimes ready to crack open wide
sometimes indignant sometimes raw
can you imagine I pay him 75 dollars an hour sometimes
it feels like highway robbery
and sometimes it's peanuts
I wish it could last a couple more hours

so here we both are battling similar demons (not coincidentally)
you see n getting beyond knowing it solely intellectually you're not relinquishing your majestry
you are wise you are warm you are courageous you are big
and I love you more now than I ever have in my whole life

Can't Not - ALANIS MORISSETTE

Can't Not - ALANIS MORISSETTE

i'd be lying if I said I was completely unscathed
I might be proving you right with my silence or my retaliation
would I be letting you win in my non reaction?
how would I explain?
how would I explain this to my children if I had them?
because I can't not
because I can't not
because I can't afford to be misread one more time
would I be whining if I said I needed a hug?
would you feel slighted if I said your love's not enough?
how can I complain?
how can I complain when i'm the one who reaches for it?
because I can't not
because I can't not
because I cannot walk without my crutches
because I can't not
because I can't not
because I can't help wonder why you ask me
to all the unheard wisdom in the schoolyard
you think you're the right ones
you think you're the charmed ones i'm sure
how can you go on with such conviction?
and who do you think you are why do you question me?
because we can't not
because we can't not
because we can't help laugh at underestimations
because we can't not
because we can't not
because we can't afford to be misled one more time
because we can't not
because we can't not
because we cannot help without your willingness
why do you affect me? why do you affect me still?
why do you hinder me? why do you hinder me still?
why do you unnerve? why do you unnerve me still?
why do you trigger me? why do you trigger me still?

UR - ALANIS MORISSETTE

UR - ALANIS MORISSETTE

burn the books they've got too many names and psychosis
all this incriminating evidence would surely haunt me
if someone broke into my house
suits in the living room
do you realize guys I was born in 1974
we've got someone here to explain your publishing
we know how much you love to be in front of audiences
hopeful you are
schoolbound you are
naive you are
driven you are
take a trip to new york with your guardian
and your fake identification
when they said "is there something anything
you'd like to know young lady?"
you said "yes I'd like to know what kind of people
i'll be dealing with"
precocious you are
headstrong you are
terrified you are
ahead of your time you are
don't mind our staring but
we're surprised you're not in a far-gone asylum
we're surprised you didn't crack up
lord knows that we would've
we would've liked to have been there
but you keep pushing us away
resilient you are
big time you are
ruthless you are
precious you are

I Was Hoping - ALANIS MORISSETTE

I Was Hoping - ALANIS MORISSETTE

as we were taking outside it was cold we were shivering yet warmed by the subject matter
my wife is in the next room we've been having troubles you know please don't tell her or anyone
but I need to talk to somebody
you said "wouldn't it be a shame if I knew how great I was five minutes before I died i'd be filled
with such regret before I took my last breath" and I said "you're willing to tell me this now
and you're not going to die any time soon"
and I said I haven't been eating chicken or meat or anything and you said yes
but you've been wearing leather and laughed and said we're at the top of the food chain
and yes you're a fine woman and I cringed
I was hoping I was hoping we could heal each other
I was hoping I was hoping we could be raw together
we left the restaurant where the head waiter (in his 60's) said "good-bye sir thank you for your business sir you're
successful and established sir and we like the frequency with which you dine here sir
and your money" and when I walked by they said "thank you too dear" I was all pigtails and cords
and there was a day when I would've said something like "hey dude I could buy and sell this place so kiss it"
I too once thought I was owed something
I was hoping I was hoping we could challenge each other
I was hoping I was hoping we could crack each other up
I too thought that when proved wrong I lost somehow
I too once thought life was cruel
it's a cycle really you think i'm withdrawing and guilt tripping you I think you're insensitive
and I don't feel heard and I said do you believe we are fundamentally judgmental? fundamentally evil?
and you said yes I said I don't believe in revenge in right or wrong good or bad you said
"well what about that man that I saw handcuffed in the emergency room bleeding after beating his kid
and she threw a shoe at his head.
I think what he did was wrong and I would've had a hard time feeling compassion for him"
I had to watch my tone for fear of having you feel judged.
I was hoping I was hoping we could dance together
I was hoping I was hoping we could be creamy together

One - ALANIS MORISSETTE

One - ALANIS MORISSETTE

I am the biggest hypocrite
I've been undeniably jealous
I have been loud and pretentious
I have been utterly threatened
I've gotten candy for my self-interest
the sexy treadmill capitalist
heaven forbid I be criticized
heaven forbid I be ignored

I have abused my power forgive me
you mean we actually are all one
one one one one one one one
I've been out of reach and separatist
heaven forbid average (whatever average means)
I have compensated for my days
of powerlessness

I have abused my so-called power forgive me
you mean we actually are all one
one one one one one one one

did you just call her amazing?
surely we both can't be amazing!
and give up my hard earned status
as fabulous freak of nature?

I have abused my power forgive me
you mean we actually are all one
one one one one one one one
always looked good on paper
sounded good in theory